Los Perdidos: The Novel (Sons of Glory Motorcycle Club Romance) Read online

  Gratitude filled me as I contemplated my sweet friend and roommate, who was always so glad to see me. I told her I had been too tired to go out that night, and asked her how her date had been.

  “It was so fun!” she enthused, bouncing onto her bed with excitement. “Josh was super patient about explaining all the basketball stuff to me. I never really paid much attention to it before, but it’s actually kind of exciting!”

  I smiled warmly at her, happy for my friend’s good fortune. We chatted as she moved around the room busily, getting ready for bed. As she was just about to turn off the light, I asked her the question that had been burning in my mind since she got back.

  “Kara,” I said softly, “Do you regret kissing that guy at the motorcycle bar last night?”

  Kara was silent for a moment. “Not really,” she replied. “Especially because of how things worked out, you know? Josh probably would never have said anything about how he felt if he hadn’t gotten upset over seeing me kiss that guy. So, it was worth it. And it was kind of exciting! But I would never have been brave enough to go any further, like you did.” She looked at me and smiled her lovely, innocent smile. “I mean, it was fun and everything, but you know. Guys like that and girls like us… it just wouldn’t work, would it?”

  “No, I guess it wouldn’t,” I replied quietly.

  “Why do you ask?” she asked, reaching for the light switch. “Do you? Regret going home with that guy, I mean?”

  “No,” I said, half to myself. “I don’t.”

  ☼ ☼ ☼ ☼ ☼ ☼

  The next day was Sunday, and I was bound and determined to snap out of the funk I had been in the day before. I hauled myself out of bed at about eight-thirty and forced myself to head to the shower first thing. Unfortunately, I had been dreaming about Smoke again, and my head was filled with the memory of how he smelled and tasted. I stood under the water in the private shower stall, letting the water wash over my body.

  I was the only one in the bathroom at this relatively early hour, and as I stood there and closed my eyes, my thoughts went in spite of myself to how Smoke’s fingers had felt as they brushed against my skin. Heat grew between my thighs at the memory, and I couldn’t stop myself from reaching down to caress my slick folds with a trembling finger. In my mind, Smoke parted my legs and entered me with his tongue as I stifled a moan. My other hand went to my breast, and I softly pinched my hardening nipple while my hips began to buck against my palm. I spread my legs and leaned my back against the wall, opening to my fantasy of Smoke teasing me and drawing me closer and closer to release. My finger, now slick with my juices, slid out of me and began to swirl around my swollen nub, becoming Smoke’s flicking tongue. I cried out softly as the wave of my orgasm burst forth, surprising me with its strength and speed. Gasping, I leaned against the wall, catching my breath, and pleasure mixed with regret as I realized I was only making it worse for myself by prolonging the fantasy of him.

  A bit dejected but determined to put all thoughts of Smoke from my mind, I emerged from the shower. After toweling off and brushing my teeth, I padded back to my room, where Kara was still asleep. As quietly as I could, I dressed myself and grabbed my backpack full of books, stopping to scribble a note reminding her about our plans with Dana that night. Then I left the dorm, had a hurried breakfast in the dining hall, and went to hole myself up in my favorite remote corner of the student union to catch up on my studying.

  I spent most of the day scrambling to finish all the homework I had been putting off since Friday. The morning and then the afternoon dragged on interminably, as I moved from place to place to avoid the boredom of sitting in one location for too long. But try as I might, I just couldn’t keep my mind on my work. I did a half-hearted job at best of my assignments as I watched the minutes and hours crawl by. It was a colossal relief when it was finally time for me to go back and get ready for dinner and drinks with my girls. I practically flew back to the dorm to dump my books and be done with studying for the day. Standing in front of my closet to choose an outfit for the evening, my eyes involuntarily went to the laundry basket at the bottom, where the pair of uber-short shorts I had worn to the Black Dog lay. I shivered again as I remembered the feel of Smoke’s touch between my legs. Angrily, I pulled off the T-shirt I was wearing and threw it over the shorts so I wouldn’t have to look at them anymore. I dressed for the evening in my favorite pair of skinny jeans, a flattering purple tank, and a pair of low-cut boots. Kara showed up soon after I did to get ready herself. I asked her if I could borrow her tiny leather jacket to complete my look. While she got dressed, I made up my face, the two of us chatting about nothing in particular. I found myself putting on just a tiny bit more mascara and eyeliner than I normally did, unconsciously trying to achieve a more subdued version of the look I had on Friday night. As I looked in the mirror, I smiled slightly in satisfaction, liking what I saw.

  We went out to Lenny’s, a campus bar we frequented on the weekends. The atmosphere that night was the same as it always was – loud and fun. Most of the other patrons were college students like us. Familiar faces were all around, but it just didn’t have the same appeal to me it usually did. I did my best to let go and have a good time, but I was just phoning it in, and I think my friends knew it.

  “Are you okay, Jen?” Kara asked me at one point, breaking off her monologue about how cute and funny Josh was. Both she and Dana were staring at me strangely. I wondered if I’d been zoning out for very long.

  “Yeah, of course. Sorry, you guys,” I apologized. “I’m going to run to the bathroom. Can I get you anything on the way back?” I asked, standing up. I took their orders – a White Russian for Dana, a rum and coke for Kara – and headed away from them. I needed a break from the noisy bar. The bathroom was mercifully empty, and I leaned against the sink and stared into space for a few moments. Mechanically, I took my phone out and checked it, even though I knew there couldn’t be a message from the one person I wanted to hear from. Of course, there was nothing. With a heavy sigh, I turned around and looked at myself in the mirror. I looked tired, at least to me. Frowning, I stuck ny tongue out at the mirror and gave myself a good mental scolding. I pinched my cheeks to get some color in them, then applied some fresh lip gloss and fluffed my hair before walking back out into the crowd.

  Weirdly, as little as I was enjoying myself at Lenny’s, I seemed to be attracting the attention of a number of males in the crowd without even trying. For once, I hadn’t even bothered to get “dressed for success,” as Dana put it, but even so, guys were paying attention to me like I’d walked in wearing a playboy bunny outfit and fuck me heels. A number of them watched me with obvious interest as I walked toward the bar. Normally, this would have made me extremely happy, if nervous, but tonight I just felt indifferent to all of it.

  I slid up to the bar and caught the bartender’s attention. “Two rum and cokes and one White Russian,” I ordered. While I waited for him to fill my order, I stared at replays of a basketball game on TV to pass the time.

  “Hey,” said a familiar voice next to me. I turned to see my ex-boyfriend, Seth, standing at my side.

  Only a little over a month had passed since Seth and I had broken up, but as I stood there looking at his classic college-boy good looks – short brown hair, square jaw, muscular gym-rat physique – it felt like much, much longer. I remember how hot I had found Seth when we first met. Not to mention how thrilled I had been when he first asked me out. A guy like that seemed like an unbelievably good catch at the time. He was definitely better looking than any of the guys I had dated in high school. Kara and Dana had been wide-eyed with envy that I had landed such a hottie. Unfortunately, Seth’s good looks didn’t translate into good boyfriend material. As I looked up at him now, I thought back to how disappointing our first time having sex (my first time ever) had been. Seth, despite being the kind of guy who made female friends swoon with jealousy, was less than stellar in the sack. He was very, um… focused on his own needs, shall we say?
He performed as though he was in a porn movie and the camera was on him the whole time. He had expected the same of me.

  At first, I had tried to act the part. Blame it on the stars in my eyes that I had attracted such an unexpectedly good-looking boyfriend. But eventually, my sexual frustration began to mount, and I started making what I thought were gentle requests for some more “attention.” His reaction was to become offended, and then to basically blame my lack of satisfaction on my own inexperience. When I eventually got a clue that this wasn’t okay and broke up with him, he was completely taken by surprise. So were Kara and Dana, for that matter. They couldn’t believe I’d let such a catch slip through my fingers. They had asked me why I had ended things with him, but even though they were my best friends, I just didn’t feel like getting into it.

  Now, here Seth was in front of me, looking at me expectantly, like a guy who is used to being admired. Apparently, he had completely forgotten I was the one who broke up with him, and not the other way around. “So, Jenny, how’s it going? You’re looking hot tonight!” he grinned at me.

  I turned around and shot a glance at my girls, who were both staring at Seth and me wide-eyed. Dana flashed me a wide, hopeful grin and Kara gave me a subtle thumbs up. It seemed that they were hoping for a reconciliation. I realized, with a small pang of sadness, that if Seth and I were still together, then we could all be going on couple dates, now that Kara and Josh were together. I wondered if that’s what Kara and Dana were thinking, too. Even though I really liked Cory, I had to admit that I had seen much less of my best friend since he and Dana had started dating. I wondered if, now that Kara and Josh were paired up, the two couples would start seeing more of each other, and I would be left out like the fifth wheel that I was.

  Seth was looking at me quizzically, and I realized he had asked me a question. “I’m sorry, what did you say?” I stammered, pulling myself back to the present.

  “I said, I was wondering if you wanted to go grab dinner sometime this week. I know your birthday is coming up… maybe I could take you out to celebrate?” Seth’s easy grin told me that he didn’t have the slightest fear of being turned down. Ironically, even though he seemed to have forgotten that I was the one who had ended things between us, he had somehow remembered that my birthday was in a few days. It was the first time he had ever remembered any date that had been significant to me. I was almost impressed, and then I remembered that he had asked me to plug the date into his phone months ago.

  I smiled up at him. Seth, you haven’t changed a bit, I thought. “Thanks for the offer, Seth, but I think we should just leave things as they are.” My drinks had arrived, and I pulled out cash to pay for them. (I had an almost compulsive fear of credit cards, which my friends mocked me for endlessly.) Without waiting for an answer, I left the change for the bartender and scooped up the drinks. “Bye, Seth. It was good seeing you.”

  I returned to my table, where Dana and Kara were staring at me wide-eyed. “So what happened?” Dana squealed. She had always had a huge crush on Seth, though she denied it in front of Cory. “Are you guys getting back together?”

  I laughed. “Oh, my God, Dana. No. He asked me out, and I turned him down.”

  “You did what?” Kara gasped. Since I had never told either of them my reasons for breaking up with Seth, I realized now they must have assumed I regretted it.

  “Look, you guys, Seth and I are not getting back together. I’ll tell you about it sometime, but right now I don’t feel like getting into it, okay?” I pushed their drinks at them and lifted mine to take a sip.

  “Okay,” said Dana grudgingly, stirring her White Russian. “But we need to find you a guy, Jenny-Butt. You’ve been single for far too long.”

  “Some other time, please? Tonight, I just want to hang out with my girls.” I raised my glass. “To friendship,” I toasted, not knowing yet that ours would be severely tested in just a few short days.

  “To friendship!” they chimed in, and we drank.

  We stayed at the bar until just after 10:00, when the ever-sensible Kara pointed out that we had class the next day and should probably call it a night. As we paid our tab and left the bar, I felt at peace for the first time since Friday. I walked home through the quiet streets, flanked by my friends, and told myself that it was time to turn the page on my fantasy and get back to living my real life. We got back to campus just before 10:30.

  There, sitting on his bike in front of my dorm, was Smoke.

  ☼ ☼ ☼ ☼ ☼ ☼

  Funny how quickly all your resolve can fly out the window in a single second. The moment Smoke’s eyes met mine, I knew I had fallen. I walked toward him in a daze. Dana and Kara began whispering to each other behind me.

  “Wanna take a ride?” Smoke murmured in his sexy, smoky voice as I stood before him. I nodded mutely, and the corners of his mouth turned up ever so slightly in approval.

  I turned to look at Kara and Dana. “Guys, I’m gonna go out for a bit. I’ll see you later. Kara, I have my key.” The two of them looked at Smoke, and then at me with twin expressions of wariness. “Are you sure?” Kara asked doubtfully. I knew that my friends would be discussing this after I left, but I told myself I didn’t care.

  “Yes, I’m sure. Don’t wait up.” I climbed on the back of the bike, and Smoke handed me “my” helmet. When I had strapped it into place, I said simply, “Okay,” and he started the bike and kicked it into gear. We drove off, Kara and Dana watching me wordlessly.

  “Where are you taking me?” I said into his ear as I wrapped my arms around his leather cut.

  “My place,” he said simply. My heart skipped a beat. I settled back and let the vibrations from the engine tease my suddenly throbbing sex. Riding behind Smoke was like foreplay. I wriggled against the seat, my desire mounting as the vibrations of the bike teased me, and tried to be patient.

  We rode fast, Smoke dodging in and out of traffic while I tried not to let fear get the better of me. I was still getting used to being on the back of a motorcycle, but it was clear he knew what he was doing. As he weaved in and out, I was struck by a wave of admiration mixed with animal attraction for this man, who exuded raw masculinity like no one I’d ever known.

  We crossed town and arrived at a small house in a nondescript neighborhood a few minutes’ drive from the bar. I barely had time to marvel that my sexy biker lived in such a normal-looking place as he pulled into the driveway and shut off the bike. I hopped off, hoping I was getting more graceful at it, and detached my helmet. Without a word, Smoke removed his own helmet as well, and hung them both from the handlebars. Wordlessly, he grabbed my hand and pulled me toward the front door. He yanked open the screen door, then unlocked the main door quickly with a key from the same chain I’d seen on the first night. I followed him inside.

  He was on me before the screen door had even slammed. One hand fisted in my hair, pulling my head back, and the other went around my waist, yanking me toward him. Almost savagely, his lips came down on mine, his tongue invading my all-too-willing mouth. I moaned as our tongues mingled, my panties growing damp as I felt the hardness of his need against me. I couldn’t breathe, couldn’t think – all I could do was surrender to him, beg him with my mind to not stop until I was panting and spent.

  His mouth broke away from mine and burned a path to my ear. “You’re like an addiction, you know that, College?” I felt his tongue dart inside my ear canal, making me shiver in anticipation. His hand left my hair and reached under my shirt, undoing my bra in one expert motion. “I’ve been thinking about your flame hair and your sweet pussy ever since I saw you last,” he muttered, his voice thick. He pulled my blouse up over my head roughly, and I heard the fabric rip a little, but I didn’t care. I dropped my arms and my bra fell to the floor, and then his lips were on my nipple, teasing and biting it into hardness as I moaned loudly and began to writhe in his arms. “Oh, God,” I whispered. “Yes! Smoke, take me!”

  “Tell me what you want, baby,” he purred against my
skin.

  “Fuck me, Smoke,” I said, knowing that he wanted to hear me say it. “I need you to make me come. Please, I can’t stand it, I want you so bad!” I said urgently.

  Without a word, he bent down and lifted me into his arms, carrying me through a hallway to a small, sparsely-decorated bedroom with a large, unmade bed where he set me down. I could see fairly well in the moonlight streaming through the window, but Smoke turned on a small lamp sitting on the bedside table. He stood before me, looking colossal now from below, and shrugged off his leather cut, letting it fall to the floor. Reaching up, he peeled his T-shirt off over his head, revealing to me for the first time the magnificence of his naked body. Tattoos danced over his rippling muscles. His strong, taut abs descended down in a deep V into the waistband of his jeans. I drew in my breath, admiring the pure, masculine beauty of him.

  I found myself sitting up, before I really even knew what was happening or what I was doing. Mesmerized, I reached for the fly of his jeans and undid the buttons, then the zipper. I heard his breathing catch as I pushed them down over his tight, hard ass and muscled thighs. His cock sprang free, huge and majestic. My mouth began to water at the thought of taking him in, and I moved forward, as if in a dream, to caress his purplish mushroom head with my tongue. It felt amazing, velvety smooth and hot to the touch. As I licked and stroked him, with my tongue, I was rewarded with a low groan of pleasure that emanated from deep in Smoke’s throat. I opened my mouth wide and slid him inside, as far as I could, while continuing to swirl my tongue on the underside of his cock. I had never really minded going down on a guy, but never in my life had I wanted it as badly as this. I could do this forever, I thought, loving the feel and salty taste of him. I moaned, and the vibrations of my mouth made Smoke gasp and chuckle with pleasure. “Jesus Christ, baby girl,” he groaned. “You’re gonna push me over the edge if you’re not careful.” In response, I only redoubled my efforts, wanting to taste his salty orgasm, to swallow every bit if it, to show him how much I wanted him.